(Legal) Magic Mushrooms

I’m with ya.  The holidays are done and the (over) indulging on just about everything has you feeling like a big fatty McFat fat.  I get it.  Drinking is fun…and sometimes needed during the holidays.  Eating rich, fatty, carb-loaded foods at all hours without regard for your own well-being is awesome.  But, of course, we know this type of behavior cannot sustain itself.  We have clothes we like to wear and these eating/drinking habits are making us angry at said clothes for not fitting anymore.  Aside from the fact that directing hate toward an inanimate object is just weird and deserving of medication, we can’t just throw money at a new wardrobe every year because we can’t stop our waistline from expanding faster than the universe (NERD ALERT!!!).  It’s time to do your body and your favorite pair of jeans a favor.  Cook up some low-cal deliciousness (yes, it’s possible) and I’m here to help.


  • 24 oz Mushrooms (standard White Mushrooms work great, but any variety will do)
  • 1/8 cup Extra Virgin Olive Oil
  • 1 tbsp Minced Garlic
  • 2 tsp Dried Thyme
  • 1/4 cup Beef Stock (or use some good Red Wine if you want to keep it vegetarian)
  • 2 tbsp Worcestershire Sauce
  • Salt and Pepper to taste
  • Chopped Parsley (Totally optional.  All it does is make the presentation look pretty)


Start off by heating a large skillet over medium high heat.  I like to use stainless steel for this because it gets all those yummy brown bits stuck to the bottom of the pan (brown bits = FLAVOR!!!), but if all you have is non-stick, that’ll work just fine.  Once that skillet is screamin’ hot, add the olive oil and mushrooms.  Give it a nice stir to get the mushrooms all coated in that oh so healthy olive oil.

Pro Tip: If it looks like your skillet is too dry once adding the mushrooms, don’t panic.  Just add some more olive oil to the pan.  Mushrooms are thirsty little fungi.

Now, there’s a couple different ways to get this mass amount of shroomyness tasty and browned.  You could do what I do and add the whole lot of ’em to the pan at once and save some time (and one less dirty dish).  The only issue with doing it this way, is that you’re not gonna get a really deep, rich, browning to the mushrooms.  Since they’re stacked on top of each other, they’ll steam more than brown, because…ya know…science.  The one way to avoid this from happening is by sautéing the mushrooms in 2 separate batches.  This’ll take twice as long, but the end product will be shrooms that are more golden brown and slightly deeper in flavor.  Either way, the mushrooms come out delicious, so put your big boy pants on and decide which method you’d like to use.


Once those shrooms get cookin’, they’ll begin to release some of their own moisture.  This is good.  Once this starts happening, give ’em the occasional stir and let the moisture evaporate/re-absorb into the shrooms.  This whole process takes between 10-15 min.

Once the majority of the liquid is gone, add the salt, pepper, thyme and garlic.  Stir to combine and let sauté for another minute or so.  Be VERY careful to not burn the garlic (turn the heat down a bit if you don’t want to risk it).  As delicious as garlic is, once it starts to burn, it gets extremely bitter and spiteful and no longer resembles the garlic you once knew and loved.

After the garlic and seasonings have been combined, add the Worcestershire Sauce and stock (or wine).  Give it a good stir, scraping up those bits of flavor gold off the bottom of the pan (aka: brown bits).  Once the mixture returns to a boil (it won’t take much time at all), turn the heat down to medium low and let simmer until nearly all the liquid has magically disappeared (approximately 10 minutes).


Now that the fabulous fungi are done, you can eat them as is, add them to a salad, serve them as a side with a nice lean steak, add to sautéed spinach, or even sprinkle a handful of them with cumin, chili powder, coriander and cilantro and use them for tacos, or quesadillas.  The options are limitless my friends.  They only know the bounds of your own imagination and that’s why we love these shrooms.


Ok, I know I just finished saying that it’s time to cut back and lead a healthier lifestyle as we enter the new year, but…all things in moderation…right?

The super savory, earthy flavor of the mushrooms just meld perfectly with the bittersweet, heavily roasted malt character of this exceptional (and widely distributed) beer.  The lightly smoky characteristics only enhance the overall experience.  So, hit the gym for an extra 15 minutes and ENJOY!!!


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